Q: Brother in law that I secretly don’t even like or know what he likes

A: a box of candy from somewhere not here. I’ve done British and Japanese and both were hits. I ordered these from Etsy.

Q: Boyfriend’s English parents who I’m meeting for the first time

A: Something that your hometown/region is famous for, like a particular jam flavor or an example of a traditional local art making practice. I think it’s a nice way of honoring that you’re from different places and have different experiences.

Q: All the men. Dad, brother, boyfriend

A: My first thought is one of those bird feeders with a camera so you can watch the bird up close.

My next thought was what if when it was time to give his present you stood up and acted out his favorite movie?

My dad was thrilled to get a dustbuster for his car. Would your dad be thrilled to get a dustbuster for his car?

Brother - Patreon subscriptions for podcast bonus episodes. Cook’s Illustrated subscription.

Boyfriend - assuming you have the ability to fly a flag, make him a custom insanely specific flag to fly. Like for his favorite tv show or something culturally he aligns himself with. We have a flag that says FRIDAY because Fridays rule. (This can be made using Zazzle.com)

Q: my dad who hates gifts and will tell you he hates them

A: The key to this is attitude. You must accept that there is no succeeding here. It’s about wasting minimal emotional energy on this and going for light and fun failure. Gift Certificate. Doughnut Delivery Subscription.

Q: Brother who only cares about surfing, fishing, and paddleball. FIL who is newly a grandpa

A: Some aprés sporting loungewear might be the thing? Some fuzzy adidas slides or soft Vuori joggers?

I’ve been having the best time ice dyeing presents lately. Perhaps your brother would rock a cozy hoodie that you ice dyed for him? It’s pretty easy - you just need powdered fabric dye, clothing with natural fiber (cotton, wool, linen), and ice.

FIL - my friend teaches these “private village” parenting courses where she gets on a zoom with everyone in the baby’s close community and helps everyone be on the same page about interacting with / respecting the baby. (Beech St Parenting)

or an Aura digital frame filled with updating baby pics!

Q: Friend’s husband for secret santa

A: Lottery tix and a nice beanie

Q: my soon to be ex husband (amicable split. on good terms)

A: Assuming that you’re one household that is becoming two or has recently become two I would think about the efforts/goods you have historically provided.

Maybe you care about good bath towels and he doesn’t but he has gotten used to good bath towels and now he’s not going to have the good bath towels. So you can get him some good bath towels. Something that honors the role you have played in his life.

Q: Husband and we love to do 2nd hand BUT this year I’m very pregnant so thrifting is hard

A: One year I went to a bookstore and bought a bunch of used kids books and put white out over the text and wrote my own ridiculous stories. You could do this for your husband and write a story that’s specific to the two of you and this family you’re creating.

Q: My 30 something brother who loves black coffee, antiques, and the 1994 Lion King

A: I would be silly with this one and decoupage Lion King pictures on a crafting box I got from Michael’s and put bags of really nice coffee beans inside. Maybe you could even put Lion King pictures on the coffee and make it: SIMbrew. SCARf down this delicious roast.

Q: my mom and step dad, they love traveling, gardening, and Obama

A: I’d keep it simple with some fun baggu bags they can throw in their luggage and some air tags.

Q: vegan sister in law

A: vegan butter and a butter mold? She should have cute butter too

Q: My spicy 12yo daughter who is into social justice issues and drawing on her arms

A: a tote bag or tshirt that reflects her values in a bold way.

Q: a joint gift for my partner’s bro and SIL. They have cats, bake and are crafty.

A: a rug tufting gun and some yarn!

Q: My mom! She needs nothing. Help!

A: okay she sounds like a candidate for a homemade present. My favorite gift I gave my family was compiling all the stories that get told over and over into a book of Family Fables and I gave each one a moral.

Something I did once was reach out to childhood friends who spent lots of time at our house and asked the to jot down some memories and I put that all together in a little homemade book.

…

For something much simpler, I am a huge fan of giving a fun game that you’ll all play when you’re together.

Q: Boring dad who is also a republican

A: If you feel like you can get away with it I like to give books that expand understanding.

Q: SIL, politically active, $75-ish

A: I say pair a donation to an abortion fund in her name with something food fun like a pan for making æbleskivers or this cup that makes your drink a slushie

Q: Dog obsessed parents but they and the dog have every gadget

A: Ok what is the dog’s face not already on? I’ve done dog face socks as a gift (From Divvy). I have also done dog face on a water bottle and a calendar (Zazzle.com)

Katie Kimmel does the most incredible custom dog vases.

Return address stamps with the dog’s first and last name but your parents’ address?

Q: teenage boys

A: International food snack box! Cash!

Q: Sister who is just as witty/punny as me so she probably already has everything

A: Something from her youth from eBay and something small and pretty like a simple gold chain or lovely ring. Patreon subscriptions! Who Weekly, You’re Wrong About, Every Outfit, Celebrity Memoir Book Club..

Q: 7 year old nephew and 5 year old niece

A: I think the goal there is immediately fun. Silly string. Disposable camera (and take responsibility for getting the pics developed). Walkie Talkies. Silly Hide and Go Seek Poop Toy.

Q: Wealthy 80 year old uncle who lives in Pennsylvania

A: Ok well this man probably has it all which means you get to just go for it and do something wacky and fun.

I made my nearly 80 year old father in law a cootie catcher for his birthday once and it was such a hit. Make all the fortunes related to him and it’ll be a hit.

I made the same FIL a custom Mad Libs from a NYT article (he’s a big NYT guy) but you could do like a page from a history book or something.

Q: my 3yo who has everything he needs

A: A photo album filled with pictures of all his favorite people with their names written out. Include people he sees regularly like neighbor and teachers. And lots of pictures of him at all ages. He will love!

Also last year I did an ABCs book for my son and niece called the ABCs of Bruno and Liles and I did photos related to stuff for each letter. B is for berries (pic of them berry picking, etc)

Q: 13 yo nephew who is a nerd and is very private about his interests

A: Snacks and cash forever and always!

Q: Brother’s partner who I don’t know that well and they are having a baby this week

A: If you feel like you have a handle on her personal style, I’d do loungewear that’s roomy and soft. If not I’d do something like aromatherapy shower stuff or really soft socks. Her bod is about to be ravaged.

I think a calendar is a classic good gift. Lots of folks make great ones. I always have the Poketo wall calendar for work but for a family calendar I love the one Lettie Jane does every year. This is also a great opportunity to DIY because on Zazzle you can print your own with pics of WHATEVER. (Personally I recommend favorite memes but you do you)

I made a friend a custom Guess Who game with all folks relevant to her interests. You can google about the sizes the cards need to be and everything.

I love to give a magazine subscription. It’s sooo low risk and it’s always nice to have something real to flip through. I usually gift Family Handyman, Cook’s Illustrated, Highlights or High Five for kids (kids love mail!!), or like an US Weekly or Arch Digest or Ny Mag. Go highbrow! Give the Economist to your dumbest family member!

If you have a unique skill and the ability to follow through I think a wonderful gift would be telling someone: hey, I’ll repair clothes. I’ll darn your socks. I can fix your outlet. For his birthday this year I told Pete I would solve Halloween for him and I just drew a pic of him in a costume or something like that and then together we came up with what he wanted to be and then I made it.

Printablecrosswordmaker.com lets you make custom crossword puzzles. You give the clues and the answers and it makes the puzzle for you.

Oh boy do I love to make a thing so this year I started messing around with ice dyeing. All you need is powdered fabric dye (Portland folks I get mine from Columbia Art and Drafting), ice, and natural fiber clothing/fabric. You can google a tutorial but the jist is you put ice all over something and then sprinkle the powdered dye over it. As the ice melts it distributes the color. My one tip is to let the thing sit for at least a day before washing it for brightest possible color.

What’s great about this is you can hit up a goodwill or other thrift store and upcycle stuff. Just make sure it’s made from natural fiber - cotton, wool, linen.

Give future food! Make cookie dough and freeze in balls and give that to people. Pesto frozen in cubes. Pickles. Special homemade salad dressing. Ice cream!! Amazing.